Although I love talking about myself, 99% of this site will be dedicated to you, the reader. I only want to provide value—through education, inspiration, or entertainment—and not spend too much time babbling about me. This page, however, will be different. It’s gonna be all about me.
I got inspired after reading Derek Sivers’ about page, leading me to format mine so that it’s like a mini-autobiography. I will be gone one day, and only this site will remain. So whether you’re my best friend or you’re new to the site, this should catch you up to speed.
More than anything, I want to leave the world a better place than I found it. This sounds altruistic (and cheesy), but it’s actually selfish — it makes me feel better when helping others. I get such a high knowing that something I did, specifically, made someone else’s life better. I genuinely enjoy life and I want others to enjoy it, too.
I also feel a sense of personal responsibility and duty to live up to my potential. I was blessed with the best parents and endless opportunities, so it makes me feel guilty to think about wasting them. So much of my life is thanks to luck, and I’d be doing the world a disservice if I didn’t take advantage.
I want to be good and do good, simple as that. What that actually means, I’m not so sure, but I can feel it in my heart when deciding between right versus wrong. I know I’m on the right track if what I’m doing is helping me, helping those I love, and helping the community. Whenever I feel lost, that is my simple reminder for what I should do next.
To bring things back down to Earth, I want my days to consist of doing what I want to do from the time I wake up to the time I go to sleep. But when things are out of my control, I do my best to keep a Stoic mindset. Meaning, if I can’t change something I will accept it and focus on what comes next.
“Strong views, loosely held.” — a quote by tech icon billionaire, Marc Andreessen, that I like to subscribe to. To me, it means I’m confident in what I believe in, but I could be full of shit. It allows me to live with strong convictions, yet subject to a checks-and-balances system. If something comes up to challenge my current views or beliefs, I fight against my ego to keep me from seeing the Truth. If there’s sufficient evidence, I’m happy to change my mind.
As a kid, I never would’ve thought I would spend most of my time as an adult reading and writing. But it’s true, and I view them as different ways to articulate thoughts. When I’m reading, I make connections, ideas, and mold my views on things. When I write, I’m learning how to articulate those thoughts in a more sophisticated manner. Most of what goes on in my mind is just chatter, but when I write, it feels more like expressive thinking.
This also means I’m in my head a lot. I’m not always the best listener because I can be working through a problem in my head and not hear a word the person said. This is not to brag, because I don’t want this to happen and I think it’s selfish, but it can be both a blessing and a curse. Being able to shut the world off can be helpful when critical thinking and concentration are required, but it can be hurtful to people trying to tell me about their day. It’s a constant work in-progress.
I wrote the above paragraph about a year ago. Since then, I have been “working” on being more present and the main thing I’ve learned is that I don’t need to “work” on anything. Everything already is exactly the way it is. For me to “try” to be present is actually a paradox. Instead, I’m learning to drop back, and surrender to experience. I know this sounds woo-woo to some, but it’s an extremely free way of living. It’s giving up the struggle entirely; to resist against whatever it is that I’m currently experiencing (anxiety, worry, etc.) will only take me further from the peace I’m yearning for. No matter what, everything is already OK. I’m OK. You’re OK.
“What if nothing was truly at stake here? What if improving your experience of the world was seen as a form of play, with no winners or losers?” ⏤ Nate Green
“What’s here now if there’s no problem to solve? It’s possible to “lose” this problem-solver identity for short periods of time, and the resulting experience feels incredibly natural and peaceful. The goal isn’t to deny the normal difficult situations in your life, but to escape the prison of the problem-solver identity — even if only for a moment.” ⏤ Loch Kelly
The identities of an “extrovert” and an “introvert” seem like an unnecessary dichotomy to me. For most of the day, I love being alone. Like I said before—reading, writing, and thinking are how I spend most of my time. But I also thrive around other people and love having genuine conversations. So, I’ve claimed my identity as just a “vert.”
Going out to eat is one of my favorite things to do. Not for the food part per se (although filets and wine definitely don’t me sad), but because of the social aspect. In my eyes, joining together with people you care about—telling stories, cracking jokes, and sharing lives whilst sharing food and drinks—is the purest type of human bonding.
Finding the right balance of solitude and socializing is what works for me.
I’m not sure if it’s thanks to nature or nurture, or both, but I am forever thankful for being a hard-wired optimist.
I give people the benefit of the doubt. I see the good in people more than the bad. I have perspective of what evil and poverty actually looks like, so I choose to be grateful. I want to make positivity louder. I don’t think pessimism is useful in most situations. Being around negative people is equivalent to hanging out with vampires who are trying to suck my soul dry. I believe in realistic optimism—blind optimism creates naiveté, and pessimism is sometimes necessary.
I’m usually smiling. 🙂
I love to laugh. Over the last few years, stand-up comedy has become a cornerstone in my life and it wasn’t until I discovered one of my favorite comedians, Chris D’Elia, that I realized the importance of silliness. Chris embraces being an idiot and having a Silly Goose Time. Even with the success and fame he’s had at his age (38), he’s still confident enough to make a fool out of himself in front of thousands of people.
Examples of a Silly Goose Time include playing pranks on others, mocking your friends, mocking yourself, self-loathing, impersonating people you shouldn’t impersonate, joking around when it’s inappropriate to joke around, making serious situations WAY less serious, making weird sounds, and quite simply ⏤ being a silly fuckin’ goose.
The world always needs more belly laughs.
I was naturally drawn to fitness when I realized I could put in a certain amount of effort and produce a tangible result from those efforts. It made me obsessed with progress, which I think is a key to happiness.
Coaching people along their “fitness journeys” is my craft and what I’m good at. I understand the science behind gaining muscle and losing fat, and I understand how to communicate with people to motivate change.
But recently, I’ve noticed fitness becoming more of the vehicle for how I want to impact other people. Getting people abs isn’t what matters to me—making them believe in themselves and do what they thought they couldn’t, is my real aim. Fitness coaching is what I’m doing currently, but I see that developing over the years into something more. Hence, my tagline: “More than fitness.”
Being a great dad.
Taking care of my family.
More quality time with people I love.
More connection with my readers like you.
If I can help in any way, make sure to join my weekly newsletter and hit “reply” to the first email you get from me.
Let me know what’s going on with you. I read everything I get.